It was pretty good and I was motivated to study. However, it is going to be really really hard. I am a little nervous about it. Mostly about my Momentum and Heat Transfer class.
So, my roommate drives me nuts. She has not stopped talking to me since I got back to the apartment. And Everything she talks about it either something I have experienced before or she is trying to one up me. I don't understand. She just states obvious things, over and over. She is like the younger sibling that never lets you alone. Just asking you questions about every little thing. If I leave a knife in the sink with a tad of peanut butter on it she will ask "So, did you eat peanut butter." And internally I am thinking "WHY THE H DO YOU HAVE TO KNOW! OFCOURSE I HAD PEANUT BUTTER!!! YOU CAN FREAKIING SEE IT!!!!"
but I just grunt in affirmative.
But then tonight she read me the bit in her journal about me. She said I was the greatest person she has ever met and she is so grateful for me. Which is sweet, and makes me feel like I shouldn't be so internally mean.
I am in conflict. I just get so irritated all the time.
On a side note, I watched a horrible movie. A horrible awesome movie. Warm Bodies.
I felt like I couldn't breathe, so I stood up and I was shaking. SO I realized I was having a panic attack.
I texed my friend for some advice on what to do, and this is what happened. (all via text)
once upon a time there was a donkey....
his name was
donkey...
And he was sad because all of his friends called him an ass.
So
he went to find the good fairy, he wanted her to turn him into a noble
steed.
So, he climbed over mountains and crossed raging rivers and
karate chopped a goat. until he finally came to the good fairy's
dwelling....
He asked the fairy if she could turn him into a noble steed.
The fairy said, you must climb the mountain wannahakaloogie and hak a
loogie over the side of the mountain...
So he did. And it hit a squirrel...
And he turned into a noble steed.
However, the squirrel told all of his
squirrel friends what had happened....
Then all of the squirrels in all of
the land gained opposable thumbs and began work on their war machine.
unbeknownst to the noble steed, he was about to be attacked in his
sleep.
The squirrels used their war machine and sadly he was chopped
into bits and sold to a Chinese man who was then able to open a Chinese
buffet. The end.
So, I went to go see the boy.
he had been sick and in the hospital for a about a week. I have not spoken to him since he told me we should not be friends anymore. You know, that was pretty darn lame. And it hurt at the time, a lot.
But I can not describe how glad I am that it is over. I am very very happy that relationship is over. I hate the cliche response that girls have: "Well, I learned what I don't want in a guy."
I would say that- I don't necessarily regret, nor do I not regret the relationship. But, I did learn about myself. I don't think I am stronger or that I have grown. I just feel more aware of how I am and how I react to situations in relationships. I learned some valuable lessons about myself.
I went to go see him in the hospital.
I really didn't want to, but all day at church I just kept feeling like I should go. So, I did. I didn't want to. I couldn't say "well, I just wanted to drop by and see how you are doing." because I don't. And, in honesty I don't really care if he get's better or not.
I didn't know what I would say.
It's been almost a year. Almost 11 months exactly. I pretty much hated him and he knew it. So, why do I need to go visit him in the hospital? What would my actions say?
So, I put on my big girl panties and went. I told the Lord that, if I was supposed to go- I would find my way easily.
And I pretty much did.
It was kind of awkward, but not as awkward as it could have been. We talked, but not about us, just about the things we were doing at the moment (ie working or school). He related to me how being in the hospital he began to feel completely helpless, and he had his first ever panic attack.
hahaha.
I know what that's like.
But, I stayed for a short time. He was just as surprised to see me there as I was. I don't want to be friends again. I don't want anything to come of this. But I feel a little more free then I did a day ago.
I was running in my favorite spot to run. It isn't all the time that I get to run there anymore. I like running in a place out of the way. Like I own the place. And I can be alone with my thoughts.
I was running, I was just going to do 3 miles, but the air in my lungs just felt so good. It's cold, but I am warm, and a nice breeze is cutting through my clothes.
A car stopped next to me and I realized it was a friend I haven't seen in a long time.
She says "I saw someone running and I knew I had to know them." Because we did put a lot of miles on that road. I miss it.
A while ago I read an article in the runners magazine. The author was describing his idea of what a runner is, like, I don't have the fancy running outfits or the pace to be a real runner. But what makes a runner? Is it really fancy clothes or the fastest pace? No. It's the enjoyment we get. He says it's the little pile of dirty clothes that makes you a runner. He went on to say that all runners have an understanding.
We spent the day with some old family friends. We have known them for as long as I have lived. And what is weird is that we have all moved to the same city 3 times. Crazy right? It's weird to see where we have all been, and where we are going.
I move around a lot. I feel like I leave people behind all the time. People I really really care about and are important to me.
Today, one of the people I care about, and had built a good friendship with, and who I now consider my cousin came down for the day. It is so awesome, that even though there are years between the times we have seen each other, we can catch up and build our friendship. I miss them, my family back home, but it was so good to see Laura today, and see where life has been going for her and them. They really are special.
And I learned an interesting story.
By great aunt. (grandfather's uncle's wife) had some courage. Her name was Ruth.
Way back in the 40's, she and a couple of her friends got into a car and drove up to Alaska. There were four of them. She stayed in Alaska, for the rest of her life. Just 4 girls. Drove up to Alaska. By themselves. Before anything existed in Alaska. I come from some sturdy stalk.
So, I got an awesome Galaxy note 10.1 for Christmas. It is one of the coolest things out there on the market, however it can't quite handle the amount of homework I have and is not smart enough to do so. It also is not compatible with everything that my Laptop and Ipod do. So, I thought it was too extravagant of an item for me to have.
What I wanted was an Ipod touch, but I sound like an idiot when I say that.
There are so many tablets out there, there are so many electronic wifi products out there. There is so many ways that we can connect to the cloud, but I just want a small little rinky dink Ipod touch.
As I was standing there, looking at all the amazing technology that we have, thinking how awesome it is, and how much I want to be able to use all of it. I just couldn't help but think there is too much. Whatever I buy will overlap, but not completely replace a device I already have.
So, I decided to go with what felt comfortable, and what felt not extravagant and a little behind the times.
Also, a few days ago we watched the Hobbit part 2. I felt let down. The movie was great and all, but there were a lot of times in the movie that I thought "this wasn't part of the book". I feel like the integrity of the story gets muddled in the changes they make in the storyline, and it kind of let's me down a little bit. I just love the book so much.
Oliphaunt
Grey as a mouse,
Big as a house,
Nose like a snake,
I make the earth shake,
As I tramp through the grass;
Trees crack as I pass.
With horns in my mouth
I walk in the South,
Flapping big ears.
Beyond count of years
I stump round and round,
Never lie on the ground,
Not even to die.
Oliphaunt am I,
Biggest of all,
Huge, old, and tall.
If ever you'd met me
You wouldn't forget me.
If you never do,
You won't think I'm true;
But old Oliphaunt am I,
And I never lie.
jrr tolkien
Brontosaurus Poem
Garil Kredenser
The giant brontosaurus
Was a prehistoric chap
With four fat feet to stand on
And a very skimpy lap.
The scientists assure us
Of a most amazing thing -
A brontosaurus blossomed
When he had a chance to sing!
(The brigger brontosauruses,
Who like to sing in choruses,
Would close their eyes
And harmonize
And sing most anything.)
They growled and they yowled,
They deedled and they dummed;
They warbled and they whistled,
The howled and they hummed.
They didn't eat, they didn't sleep;
They sang and sang all day.
Now all you'll find are footprints
Where they tapped the time away!
I Saw A Little Girl I Hate by Arnold
Spilka
I saw a little girl I hate
And kicked her with my toes.
She turned
And smiled
And KISSED me!
Then she punched me in the nose.
John, Tom, and James
by Charles Henry Ross
John was a bad boy, and beat a poor cat;
Tom put a stone in a blind man’s hat;
James was the boy who neglected his prayers;
They’ve all grown up ugly, and nobody cares.
(from Through
the Looking-Glass and What Alice
Found There, 1872)
`Twas
brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
"Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!" He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought --
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought. And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came! One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back. "And, has thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!'
He chortled in his joy.
`Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
This Christmas two of my siblings are off having adventures of their own on their missions. So, we had my two younger brothers and the one who is married brought his wife.
The Christmas break started with a luncheon my mother and I had with our really really close friend and her mother who used to babysit my two younger siblings and me. Mom used the GPS on her phone to get us there, however we didn't want to go the "shorter way" because it included tolls. So, we were driving old-fashioned using the map to guide is through neighborhoods and back-roads. When we got to a point where we knew it would be shorter to just go the "non-toll" way we switched the GPS and started using it's directions, only to find out that it wanted to take us ALL the way back to the "toll way". I think there is a conspiracy between the government- using tolls, and GPS equipment. They just want our money.
Lunch was a lot of fun. I had not seen my babysitter in over 15 years. But I do remember her. The time was too short to catch up, but it was defiantly nice to sit and chat and have quite a few laughs.
Then the next day, I convinced my younger brother to use a blackhead removal sticky-pad for his nose. I can say it worked because I saw the gunk on the paper at the end, but it didn't get 3/4 of the needed gunk.
During the break we all went to see the Museum of Art in Houston. It was fun and there were a lot of things to see. I love art and painting, however, I think I am really picky. There were a few pieces that I loved. And then there were a lot of naked people, which I try to stay away from.
We were looking at classical and colonial pieces and noticed how thoroughly detailed they are. I have never noticed it before. I am horrible at painting people and as I was looking at these pieces I could see how the "shading" to depict people isn't necessarily shading, but using an array of skin colors to depict the 3-D nature. It was an eye opening moment and I realized how novice my painting skills are.
We also went to the Science Museum in Houston. OH MY GOSH, Loved it! there was so much to see and so much to learn. It is a little sad that science museums mostly cater to children, but there is still knowledge to learn as an adult. I got to see a few cool things about the elements and I got to see a real periodic table with compartments to hold the actual element in what we see every day. However, most of the periodic elements had just bottles with labels because their element is unstable.
AND WE GOT TO SEE DINOSAURS. I never really could conceive mentally how HUGE they were. The bugs back in the day were the size of humans. there was a bear skeleton next to a dinosaur for size reference, granted it wasn't a Kodiak grizzly, but the Dinosaur's skeleton would fill up 5 rooms. And there were a lot of tree rounds. I have always loved learning about really really REALLY old things. It was awesome and I wish we had more time, or rather more feet stamina.
We also got to see a TON of Gems. This one above is called "the dragon" it is a dragon naturally made out of pure Gold. I learned that I really really like dark colored gems. The ones that are dark blue, sapphire, or purple.
Then, the next say we drove to San Antonio.
I always assumed that the Alamo was in the middle of the dessert. You had to drive 40 min out of the city to get to it.
But no, it was right next door to the hotel we stayed at. It was pretty awe inspiring. There was so much death. It was sad and reverent as we walked through.
We also got to walk around the river walk. We walked the river-walk twice. Once during the day and once at night. We also got a boat ride. I thought it was worth the money to ride. We got to learn about the buildings and the city during the ride. It was a lot more interesting than just walking around. And it was more entertaining. Our guide (Michael) was pretty darn funny as well.
We went to go eat at this place called Chris Madrid's, because we wanted a heart attack. Just kidding. Someone had told us about it and so we waned to try it out. When we drove up, it was sketch, but the food was awesome. My mom and I shared a burger with re-fried beans and a tortilla on the cheese and beef. Looked weird, tasted AMAZING.
My brother has some difficulty processing food. SO I had to make him jog in place to release gas before we got into a metal tube that would quickly become gas filled and we would all die from the stench. He didn't believe that it would work, but at-last he complied, and it took 5 seconds of jogging to release the toxins. And it worked, boy it worked.
We just so happened to be in front of a cathedral at the time. It was quite disrespectful.
we also went to another mission in San Antonio called San Jose. That mission was huge, and it was pretty darn cool. There was a mill in the back that was engineered pretty ingenious and the shape of the mission was pretty cool too. But mostly it was peaceful. It was just a calming homestead like place.
Oh, and we visited this place called Bucc-es. It's everything you could ever dream of in a gas station, and more. There were red and green lights above the bathroom stalls. It was a gas station the size of a grocery store.
The next day, when we got back, we had a thousand dollars of fresh salmon and halibut thawed on our front door. It was supposed to arrive 5 days before, and it was supposed to stay frozen. However, it arrived on a Sunday and it was thawed. Which was weird and also upsetting. We spent about 10 hours canning it, because otherwise it would go bad. My new sister in law got quiet the lesson about canning and subsistence living. And she got her hands fishy.
We also went shooting. We have a few pistols and I am determined to become a good shot with mine. However, I shot with our 44 mag revolver. It screwed up my shots for a bit. That thing kicks and is supper loud!
Today is Christmas,
we got to talk to my siblings who are away from home at the movement. My sister loves Germany. Apparently they still put candles on the tree. Her tree caught fire twice during our Skype session.
My brother is struggling in Az a little bit, but I think he is learning and having quite some experiences. Today he went to a catholic mass. It's the first thing he said. "I dunno why people think Mormons are weird, I went to a catholic mass this morning, it was the weirdest thing I have ever seen. Ever."
